On or about when I was 21, I started to drink alcohol to make me a better person and to help me feel accepted by other people—alcohol made it easier for me to talk to girls (false courage). I was married at age 24. My marriage lasted about 1.5 years; and when my wife left, the separation caused even heavier drinking and hanging around with the wrong people. One night while out drinking I was offered meth and took some and really liked it. I was on a mission. I lost so many years; got into dealing drugs; became a meth dealer to afford my drug habit. Things got so bad I would do anything to get the drugs. While this was happening I got caught with a quantity of meth not one night but two nights in a row. Bail was high but I did get out. I knew I would be going to jail if I didn't get into a drug rehab program. The program was Self Help up on the Blvd. I was 43 years old when I first got there. I didn't think I had a problem with drugs or alcohol; it was my luck with the law. When I did start to admit that maybe I had a problem with drugs but didn't have a drinking problem, I had already been at Self Help 9 months. I stayed a year. A friend of mine came in to see me: John Walls. He didn't want to stay but I talked him into staying. He was a good friend. I was sober for a while but one night I was out I was in a bar and started drinking again—then I would use meth to sober up! John would call me because he knew what I was doing; I ended up in the hospital with an aneurism in my arm; John came to see me and asked if I thought I had a problem. I said yes with meth but not alcohol. John told me if I didn't go back to alcohol I wouldn't have a problem with meth and he made me think. Today I know that if John Walls didn't come to the hospital that night and say what he said I would not have realized I had a problem with alcohol. I have been sober for 18 years just because John Walls woke me up.
Thank you God for John Walls
Yours truly,
Phil M
Bobby's Story
Hi, my name is Bob Costigan, I am the housing coordinator for Fresh Start, and I would like to share my experience with John Walls. I came to Fresh Start out of jail and needed help—and I had a friend who told me about Fresh Start. Well the long and short of it is I got in and right away. I heard about John Walls, so when I met him I found out we had a couple things in common. We would talk about growing up in the same neighborhood and other things. I grew pretty close and I would wonder what made Johnny special. I couldn't believe that this guy was doing so much good for people without there being something in it for him. So I got very close to him and still kept wondering but I had to report back to prison and start a sentencing day. John insisted on going with me and talked to the Judge. I said it wouldn't do any good but he insisted, so we went and I got sentenced to 6 years in N.J. But John didn't give up. He went to N.J. and hired a lawyer and the lawyer filed for a sentence reduction, and I lost. But he still didn't give up! A year later he hired a lawyer again and this time the judge cut me loose on a Friday and John ran to get me, but the judge sent the wrong papers so Johnny came back on the following Monday and waited for another 8 hours for me. Wow this is a businessman who I am sure had better things to do than wait for me but there he was! They let me out later that afternoon and I went back to Fresh Start but I was still wondering why John Walls cared for me that much. What was in it for him? Well I worked for John ever since and I can tell you that I was with him every day until he passed away in 2003 and the answer to my question was so obvious that I would not see it.
You may have heard the old saying “you can't see the forest for the trees!” Well the answer to my question “What was in it for John? Why did he do all the things he did? This guy needs sneakers or that guy needs pants or stop and give a homeless guy some money. There were hundreds of times in the 2½ years we spent lots of time together and what I found out was that this was something that should have been so obvious to everyone that knew him. HE REALLY CARED. I know he did because I was there.
That is why I still work for Johnny today, and Bonnie carries on in the same manner. Johnny's favorite saying after doing something for somebody was "It's always a pleasure." And it was my pleasure to have known and loved him.
Another Story
In the spring of 1992, after what felt like a lifetime of using drugs and alcohol, and countless failed attempts at stopping, I found myself on the door step of Fresh Start. I had heard a lot of great stuff about this program and its founder John Walls. Later I would realize what a turning point in my recovery and my life this was.
After being accepted into the program I met Johnny for the first time and I have to admit I was a little intimidated as he was already well known in the recovery community. But Johnny welcomed me with a big smile and a warm handshake, he told me that the war was over and that I didn't have to fight anymore. I believed him.
Over the next several years I lived and worked for Fresh Start, watching it grow into what Johnny dreamed it could be. But Johnny still didn't slow down and his goal remained the same, to help as many as he could to stop drugging and drinking and learn to live a new way of life.
No one was beyond help, it didn't matter how beat up, how poor or how long someone was trying, Johnny was there. It amazed me to watch Johnny help girls working on Kensington Ave. to get to a detox and recover. I watched him run an A.A. meeting Sunday evenings for years with never a complaint.
I remember the fun times. When Johnny saw us sitting around hanging our heads, he would take 10 or 20 of us to play laser tag, or to Chinatown for lunch. He did this to let us know that we could learn to smile and have fun again.
I'm sure there are many such stories out there about Johnny and I'm sure there are thousands like me whose lives were touched by Johnny. His empathy and compassion brought hope to an entire Philadelphia neighborhood.
I wonder what I can do now to pay back a little of what he's done for me. Maybe I'll pay it forward. Johnny would want that.
Anonymous
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